Sometime last week I found myself in Kampala, Uganda with a couple of other people from Southern Africa and two from East Africa. Our flight arrived after 8pm so I thought the one hour drive from Entebbe to Kampala would be a hectic- and traffic- free one. Wrong! The roads of Kampala were busy and the driving scary. Drivers plied the roads with full beam lights and overtaking was the norm even if another car was approaching from the opposite direction. Then there were the Boda-Boda's, taxi motorcycles that drove anywhere there was space - on the left, on the right (I am more than sure I saw one going under our bus! Joke). Our driver didn't give way at the round about but neither did the others. On a number of occasions one poor lady from Lesotho who was sitting at the rear of the minibus let out little screams after a couple of other cars nearly bumped into us.
Despite pleading with the driver, he paid no attention. He kept on chatting with his front seat passenger. In the midst of all this, our colleague from Kenya kept looking towards us asking what our problem was. "I see nothing wrong with this driving, Nairobi is actually worse". The Tanzanian chap didn't look the least bit bothered either.
Our Mozambican colleague summed it all up by saying "I think I should appreciate Mozambican driving more". I think I should appreciate Malawian drivers more myself after that experience.
Monday, November 26, 2007
Thursday, November 1, 2007
Match economic stability with politcal stability
It has been announced that the Reserve Bank of Malawi has reduced the base lending rate by 2.5 percentage points to 15%. Am no economist but I would think this is a good indication of the monetary situation in the country. As a citizen, this is great news as the cost of borrowing gets cheaper despite the fact that commercial banks will normally set their base lending rate 2-3 percentage points above the RBM one then add on another 6 percentage points as their markup. So in effect I will still be paying 23% +/- interest. Nevertheless, economically things are looking up.
I however believe that economic stability can't work without political stability. They work in tandem. Unfortunately statements coming from both sides of the political spectrum don't inspire much confidence. To make things worse, it is the heads of these political institutions who are in the forefront making unwanted statements. I think it's time we all struck a reconciliatory tone, starting from the state president down to the cadres at the grassroots. That way our economic gains will not be wiped away by useless political bickering.
Monday, October 29, 2007
Insanity on the roads of Lilongwe
Over the past few weeks and months, a number of traffic lights have been installed in places which previously didn't have them or vandalised one's have been replaced. These devices were placed there with the aim of brining sanity to the roads of Lilongwe. Unfortunately there are a few cowboys and cowgirls on the roads who have great disrespect for these expensive traffic regulators.
Over the past weekend I happened to be waiting patiently, like most other sane drivers, for the robots to turn green. And green they turned. What happens next? Some cowgirl appeared from nowhere and drove straight into my path and stopped right in front of me because the line she was joining was backed up for some reason. Then she looks at me, frown on her face, and muttered some words which I didn't get to hear. I was temped to roll down my window and spew out her some carefully selected choice words but the good side of me told me no. I was taught as a child never to argue with fools and idiots!
I think it's time people started respecting traffic regulations. In this case, this woman jumped a red light but still went nowhere because there was a jam in front of her. She also ran the risk of bashing my car and injuring me and others in the process. Traffic police need to get on top of this situation to avoid anarchy on ours roads. Police in Blantyre at one point brought about strict traffic light compliance, Lilongwe should do the same. The road traffic department also needs to plug the source of fake licenses, like the one this lady is obviously in possession of.
Lets flush out this insanity on the roads of our beautiful city.
Over the past weekend I happened to be waiting patiently, like most other sane drivers, for the robots to turn green. And green they turned. What happens next? Some cowgirl appeared from nowhere and drove straight into my path and stopped right in front of me because the line she was joining was backed up for some reason. Then she looks at me, frown on her face, and muttered some words which I didn't get to hear. I was temped to roll down my window and spew out her some carefully selected choice words but the good side of me told me no. I was taught as a child never to argue with fools and idiots!
I think it's time people started respecting traffic regulations. In this case, this woman jumped a red light but still went nowhere because there was a jam in front of her. She also ran the risk of bashing my car and injuring me and others in the process. Traffic police need to get on top of this situation to avoid anarchy on ours roads. Police in Blantyre at one point brought about strict traffic light compliance, Lilongwe should do the same. The road traffic department also needs to plug the source of fake licenses, like the one this lady is obviously in possession of.
Lets flush out this insanity on the roads of our beautiful city.
Zinkhoswe
I still remember some eight or more years ago when I was getting engaged traditionally - Chinkhoswe. It was a very cold June afternoon at my wife's parents house. I was waiting in a room for the function to begin with my brother-in-law (not my wifes brother) and someone else. My BIL suggested they go and buy some brandy for me to drink so I 'blend' into the function nicely. I resisted for many reasons, chief amongst them being in the cold weather, I would be required to make frequent trips to the shanks. My resistance was futile. He left with this other person and promised to be back in no time. I started devising ways of how I was going to avoid that drink like a plague. To my relief they never returned. It later turned out that as they were on the way to buy the potent substance, they stumbled across a friend's braai in the area and got carried away. They returned to the chinkhoswe hours later but with no brandy in hand - they had forgotten the purpose of their mission.
I sat through the chinkhoswe just fine. My wife and I and our 'assistants' sat on a mphasa (reed mat) under a tree in the garden the whole time. It was not the most comfortable sitting experience but once in a while I stood up and that took away the discomfort. But then a new discomfort found it's way in the new shoes I was wearing which were rather tight. I also remember there was the akuchikazi (the brides side) out singing akuchimuna (the grooms side). Our side was constantly bailed out by a sister-in-law of mine and my sisters. Otherwise I can admit here and now that we were seriously outnumbered and outplayed in the singing department. Then there was the kufupa (giving money) when a metal dish was deliberately placed in front of us so that when someone was giving us advice, a coin would be thrown in to spice up the event. Otherwise it was a great event and very traditional.
Over the years I have noticed great differences in how zinkhoswe's are being held. The signing ladies and drums are long gone, the events are rarely held in the parents backyard, the mphasa is not a seat of choice anymore and that metal plate is no longer welcome.
I am not a known advocate of preservation of traditional practices but I would love to see that culture maintained and strengthened. Nevertheless all zinkhoswe's are fun!
I sat through the chinkhoswe just fine. My wife and I and our 'assistants' sat on a mphasa (reed mat) under a tree in the garden the whole time. It was not the most comfortable sitting experience but once in a while I stood up and that took away the discomfort. But then a new discomfort found it's way in the new shoes I was wearing which were rather tight. I also remember there was the akuchikazi (the brides side) out singing akuchimuna (the grooms side). Our side was constantly bailed out by a sister-in-law of mine and my sisters. Otherwise I can admit here and now that we were seriously outnumbered and outplayed in the singing department. Then there was the kufupa (giving money) when a metal dish was deliberately placed in front of us so that when someone was giving us advice, a coin would be thrown in to spice up the event. Otherwise it was a great event and very traditional.
Over the years I have noticed great differences in how zinkhoswe's are being held. The signing ladies and drums are long gone, the events are rarely held in the parents backyard, the mphasa is not a seat of choice anymore and that metal plate is no longer welcome.
I am not a known advocate of preservation of traditional practices but I would love to see that culture maintained and strengthened. Nevertheless all zinkhoswe's are fun!
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
Get serious Muluzi!
Over the past three years since leaving the presidency, Bakili Muluzi has frequently made headline news, too many times for no good reason. Recently he spoke in his home district saying he would like to remove Bingu from his seat because he (Bingu) is arrogant. Now come on, get serious! One day he says he will remove him because he is ungrateful. The next he says because he wants to stabilse commodity prices (now that made a great laugh). Bakili has this string of reasons to remove Bingu, none of which can be taken seriously. This man should seriously consider consulting Dr Ntafu on whether brain implants are possible or not first before he considers running for the high office again.
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
A Malawi with better internet connections soon?
Last week I attended the ICT Fair organised by the Malawi Chambers of Commerce and Industry in Lilongwe. Amongst the usual displays was one by Malawi Telecommunication Limited. They were showcasing wireless internet PCMCIA cards that they said can provide internet access at speeds of 115kbps. Although coverage is limited to a few urban and semi-urban areas, it should be a popular alternative to fixed wireless and dial-up services. A representative at the stand said he expects monthly costs to average around K14,000.
In a similar development, Celtel Malawi has launched GPRS services after select customers tested the service for a little over a month. Initial pricing is 19 units (19 cents) per megabit with an expected increase in cost. However, the pricing does not sound too bad.
This development should cause alarm bells ringing in the corridors of the major internet service providers. With setup costs at almost zero, these ISP's really need to come up with innovative ideas to retain it's current customer base. One problem I can foresee however is that despite being promised 115kbps, the reality is that we shall all be sharing some very measly up-link which will in turn keep up firmly in the stone age of internet communication.
In a similar development, Celtel Malawi has launched GPRS services after select customers tested the service for a little over a month. Initial pricing is 19 units (19 cents) per megabit with an expected increase in cost. However, the pricing does not sound too bad.
This development should cause alarm bells ringing in the corridors of the major internet service providers. With setup costs at almost zero, these ISP's really need to come up with innovative ideas to retain it's current customer base. One problem I can foresee however is that despite being promised 115kbps, the reality is that we shall all be sharing some very measly up-link which will in turn keep up firmly in the stone age of internet communication.
G4S Rapid ... err, Snail Response
Over the past few months things have surprisingly grown legs at my house and disappeared. Empty bottle crates, a spare car tyre, an iron, shoes, etc. Two weeks ago I rounded up my employees and told them to spill the beans. Naturally none did but at the end of it all I had my suspect.
Early this morning my gardener reported that his cell phone had gone missing and he strongly suspected the guard who had just left. The gardener had chased after the guard by bike but didn't manage to catch up with him. So he was simply reporting the event. Some 5 minutes later the guard turned up, cell in hand. He had come to confess his evil act. The story line was all too familiar 'Satana anandilowa koma Mulungu wandiuza kuti ndibweze' (Satan over came me but God has told me to return). With the events of the past months, I seized my chance to ask him about the things that had gone missing in the past. Naturally, again, he denied any knowledge. I threatened him by saying he would be taken to a police station. Ohhh, a gash of tears poured from his eyes accompanied with pleas saying he had never been arrested before and would not like to face the 'soldiers'. Dude, you should have thought about the consequences first!!
Not wanting to make a trip to the Police station (for very well known reasons) I decided to press my panic alarm button at 06:05. The service is provided by Group 4 Securicor. 5 minutes no response. I pressed another one thinking that one was faulty. another 5 minutes no response. So my wife decided to call the control centre. The excuse was that the response team in the area was attending to another call so they would be there 'soon'. At 06:20 I called them and the control centre and was told the team got lost but were now on their way. At 06:45 I called again to be told they were supposed to be at the house. I called the 'in-charge' of the team who never picked up the phone. I gave up. My wife called another three times to follow up and was told stories of getting lost and going to the Majika's house (instead of Madinga). The 'Rapid Response' team only arrived at 07:05 by which time the guard had made a run for it!!! Their story? They were actually just starting their shift and that the night shift was supposed to attend to our call. So now who does one listen too - the team or the control centre? Why did the team get 'lost' in the first place when in actuall fact this is not the first time they have come to the house? What was their reaction when they visited the Majika's house and found that no alarm had been pressed? Did they notify the control centre? If they did, what did the control centre do about it? G4S's conduct raises so many questions.
Here we were dealing with a single petty cell phone thief in broad daylight who handed himself in. What would have happened if we were dealing with a group of gun tooting and panga wielding armed robbers in the dead of night?
Early this morning my gardener reported that his cell phone had gone missing and he strongly suspected the guard who had just left. The gardener had chased after the guard by bike but didn't manage to catch up with him. So he was simply reporting the event. Some 5 minutes later the guard turned up, cell in hand. He had come to confess his evil act. The story line was all too familiar 'Satana anandilowa koma Mulungu wandiuza kuti ndibweze' (Satan over came me but God has told me to return). With the events of the past months, I seized my chance to ask him about the things that had gone missing in the past. Naturally, again, he denied any knowledge. I threatened him by saying he would be taken to a police station. Ohhh, a gash of tears poured from his eyes accompanied with pleas saying he had never been arrested before and would not like to face the 'soldiers'. Dude, you should have thought about the consequences first!!
Not wanting to make a trip to the Police station (for very well known reasons) I decided to press my panic alarm button at 06:05. The service is provided by Group 4 Securicor. 5 minutes no response. I pressed another one thinking that one was faulty. another 5 minutes no response. So my wife decided to call the control centre. The excuse was that the response team in the area was attending to another call so they would be there 'soon'. At 06:20 I called them and the control centre and was told the team got lost but were now on their way. At 06:45 I called again to be told they were supposed to be at the house. I called the 'in-charge' of the team who never picked up the phone. I gave up. My wife called another three times to follow up and was told stories of getting lost and going to the Majika's house (instead of Madinga). The 'Rapid Response' team only arrived at 07:05 by which time the guard had made a run for it!!! Their story? They were actually just starting their shift and that the night shift was supposed to attend to our call. So now who does one listen too - the team or the control centre? Why did the team get 'lost' in the first place when in actuall fact this is not the first time they have come to the house? What was their reaction when they visited the Majika's house and found that no alarm had been pressed? Did they notify the control centre? If they did, what did the control centre do about it? G4S's conduct raises so many questions.
Here we were dealing with a single petty cell phone thief in broad daylight who handed himself in. What would have happened if we were dealing with a group of gun tooting and panga wielding armed robbers in the dead of night?
Tuesday, October 9, 2007
Jack Up TVM - Part 2
I am not too sure if Parliaments allocation of K1 to TVM for financial year 2007-2008 has already started affecting operations because it would seem there is no editor at the station.
Last Saturday morning I was watching sports while waiting to see a doctor at a local clinic. The presenter gave us a list of English Premiership games to be played on the day or weekend and it looked something like this
Man U vs Weagan (Wigan perhaps?)
New Castle Vs ....... (I am certain it's Newcastle)
Bermingham vs ........ (the last time i checked it was Birmingham)
am sure if I could pause it I would have picked up more errors.
Then last night they spelt veteran politician Rose Chibambo's name as Chiwambo. Any editor worth his or her salt would know that is incorrect.
We have seen many errors in the past on our lovely tv station but I thought it was now a thing of the past. I have heard rumours recently that TVM has gone satellite and can be caught in most parts of southern Africa. Am not sure we would want to show the 'world' that we can't spell properly.
Jack up guys, please!
Last Saturday morning I was watching sports while waiting to see a doctor at a local clinic. The presenter gave us a list of English Premiership games to be played on the day or weekend and it looked something like this
Man U vs Weagan (Wigan perhaps?)
New Castle Vs ....... (I am certain it's Newcastle)
Bermingham vs ........ (the last time i checked it was Birmingham)
am sure if I could pause it I would have picked up more errors.
Then last night they spelt veteran politician Rose Chibambo's name as Chiwambo. Any editor worth his or her salt would know that is incorrect.
We have seen many errors in the past on our lovely tv station but I thought it was now a thing of the past. I have heard rumours recently that TVM has gone satellite and can be caught in most parts of southern Africa. Am not sure we would want to show the 'world' that we can't spell properly.
Jack up guys, please!
Thursday, October 4, 2007
nation wide black out
Electricity Supply Corporation (ESCOM) employees were on strike for a good part of the week, demanding portions of their pension contributions. Management seemed to have been pushing the blame to their fund managers for the cook up. It was a strike I was not very interested in and as such don't really have the details.
However on Tuesday morning I was shocked when I heard that the striking staff had threatened to switch off power to the whole country to force management to meet their demands. Now here is a corporation that does not necessarily have widespread public sympathy. To add insult to injury, they wanted to punish 12 million people because of some in-house incompetence of theirs? They have the cheek! At any point did they imagine that someone could be on an operating table at the time they would have pulled the plug? I guess not even though you don't necessarily have to be a rocket scientist to think of that. Shame on you guys!
However on Tuesday morning I was shocked when I heard that the striking staff had threatened to switch off power to the whole country to force management to meet their demands. Now here is a corporation that does not necessarily have widespread public sympathy. To add insult to injury, they wanted to punish 12 million people because of some in-house incompetence of theirs? They have the cheek! At any point did they imagine that someone could be on an operating table at the time they would have pulled the plug? I guess not even though you don't necessarily have to be a rocket scientist to think of that. Shame on you guys!
Jack up TVM
This month I have had the great misfortune of having my DStv service disconnected and it is no fault of Multichoice. As such I was forced to watch some local TV. I must say that I was pleasantly impressed by two adverts, one a TNM one and another by Daily Times. They were refreshing and different. I am more than certain they were not cooked up in a TVM studio! There were one or two other usual ad's, very easy to forget.
I was however dismayed with the news. The content was propaganda. The news interviews a disgrace. The same old tricks from the times of Brown Mpinganjira. When will TVM realise we want to watch news and not a group of people bashing the speaker on an issue the group itself seemed clueless about? We want issues and not footage of people masquerading as political defectors. It's time TVM jacked up!
I was however dismayed with the news. The content was propaganda. The news interviews a disgrace. The same old tricks from the times of Brown Mpinganjira. When will TVM realise we want to watch news and not a group of people bashing the speaker on an issue the group itself seemed clueless about? We want issues and not footage of people masquerading as political defectors. It's time TVM jacked up!
Monday, September 24, 2007
Fear of failure? Rather the effects of failure!
In todays edition of the Nation newspaper, First Merchant Bank vice chairman Hitesh Anadkat has decried the poor risk taking culture amongst Malawians. He noted that the country has a lack of entrepreneurs who are ready to risk it all for fear of failure. He pointed out other things like the need for people to sacrifice and save and also the need for the country to encourage entrepreneurs regardless of colour.
Mr Anadkat raised important issues in the paper he delivered to an accountants meeting worth noting. However he seems to oversimplify the issues as well. Here is a situation I put myself in if I were to take this risk. I save a few thousands of kwacha's, say K300,000, and venture into a business. I have a near excellent business plan and have the technical knowhow to get things going. Two months down the line the environment has changed and the market is not responding as anticipated. I go to a bank, for arguments sake it's First Merchant Bank, to get an overdraft facility. I have been a personal account holder for a few years but my business account is just two months old. I have no business track record worth talking about. My application for an overdraft is rejected, this is despite having a near excellent business plan. The reason it's not excellent is because I just didn't factor in one or two external environmental factors that could affect my whole business plan. So with no overdraft, my business folds. I go to a string of banks with a revised business plan to get a loan but it is rejected. Why? I failed before, am bankrupt so to say, am likely to fail again. After all, I have no business track record worth writing home about. So am basically screwed. Tail between legs, I start applying for a job. No one wants to take me because am high risk. I could leave anytime to go and restart another business. Am condemned to the growing list of the unemployed!
I know of a project under Absa Bank called the Incubator Fund where the bank will provide loans to people who intend to start a business but lack one skill necessary for business. Say a bartender with many years experience would get a loan and a person to help him with the finances for an agreed period of time. The person would handle procurement, marketing and customer service as he has the experience doing that. This way the business is definitely assured of short term survival while accounts skills are transferred to the owner or a partner/family member he will run the bar with. At the end of the day Absa Bank is happy it has empowered another entrepreneur who in the medium to long term will have full control over his business and make the necessary repayments back to them.
I think putting the blame squarely on fear of failure is not right. The domino effect from failure is not a pleasant one. It's torture!
Mr Anadkat raised important issues in the paper he delivered to an accountants meeting worth noting. However he seems to oversimplify the issues as well. Here is a situation I put myself in if I were to take this risk. I save a few thousands of kwacha's, say K300,000, and venture into a business. I have a near excellent business plan and have the technical knowhow to get things going. Two months down the line the environment has changed and the market is not responding as anticipated. I go to a bank, for arguments sake it's First Merchant Bank, to get an overdraft facility. I have been a personal account holder for a few years but my business account is just two months old. I have no business track record worth talking about. My application for an overdraft is rejected, this is despite having a near excellent business plan. The reason it's not excellent is because I just didn't factor in one or two external environmental factors that could affect my whole business plan. So with no overdraft, my business folds. I go to a string of banks with a revised business plan to get a loan but it is rejected. Why? I failed before, am bankrupt so to say, am likely to fail again. After all, I have no business track record worth writing home about. So am basically screwed. Tail between legs, I start applying for a job. No one wants to take me because am high risk. I could leave anytime to go and restart another business. Am condemned to the growing list of the unemployed!
I know of a project under Absa Bank called the Incubator Fund where the bank will provide loans to people who intend to start a business but lack one skill necessary for business. Say a bartender with many years experience would get a loan and a person to help him with the finances for an agreed period of time. The person would handle procurement, marketing and customer service as he has the experience doing that. This way the business is definitely assured of short term survival while accounts skills are transferred to the owner or a partner/family member he will run the bar with. At the end of the day Absa Bank is happy it has empowered another entrepreneur who in the medium to long term will have full control over his business and make the necessary repayments back to them.
I think putting the blame squarely on fear of failure is not right. The domino effect from failure is not a pleasant one. It's torture!
Wednesday, September 19, 2007
Blues of the Malawian tenant
The other day I received a letter from my estate agents that my rentals were going to be raised by 20%, an annual increase applied to all rentals regardless of whether it is necessary to do so or not.
I have no problems with rentals being increased. I have a problem when no justification is given. If I look at the indicators around me, the percentage is not justified. Firstly Bakili Muluzi is no longer the president of Malawi i.e. the inflation rate hit the single digit months ago and things are looking up. Secondly repairs that were supposed to take place to some fixtures in the house have not been done nine months down the line. Thirdly, it's just not cool to raise rents!! After all I only got a 10% raise on my salary this year!!
I have no problems with rentals being increased. I have a problem when no justification is given. If I look at the indicators around me, the percentage is not justified. Firstly Bakili Muluzi is no longer the president of Malawi i.e. the inflation rate hit the single digit months ago and things are looking up. Secondly repairs that were supposed to take place to some fixtures in the house have not been done nine months down the line. Thirdly, it's just not cool to raise rents!! After all I only got a 10% raise on my salary this year!!
Malawi calling fashion police!
I must admit am not the most fashionable person around town but never the less I try. I have seen fashion rules being broken around me left, right and centre but I guess without such offenders, life would be dull. However I have just met one who deserves the maximum penalty the fashion police can mete out. Some guy, and a tough tall one too like Jeff from Big Brother, had the audacity to carry around a pink cellphone. And to add a little flavour, it was not hidden in his pocket. He very happily fiddling with it in his hand!! Fashion Disaster trophy goes to ....
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
RIP Musamude Fumulani
Death has robbed yet again us of a talented and entertaining musician, Musamude Fumulani. The band leader of Black Missionaries succumbed to TB yesterday in Blantyre. Rest in peace homeboy.
Wednesday, September 12, 2007
Silver fans, how dare you?
Recently Reserve Bank announced that it would stop bank rolling Silver Strikers football club in addition to selling the stadium and club house. This was sad news for the well financed club, it's supporters and the football loving public in general. One does not need to be a rocket scientist to see the troubles teams like Michiru Castles and Big Bullets are through.
However what I find absurd and totally out of line was the demand by fans and/or supporters that called on the RBM Governor to resign for pulling the plug on sponsorship! Excuse me but where on earth do they get the mandate to call for his head? He explained that the central bank is not in the business of running a football team. He has put his facts on the table and they make proper business sense. Can the supporters give more convincing facts for the governor to resign other than the feeble excuse that previous governors continued to sponsor the team? If they can't I would advise them to use their remaining energies on fund raising or finding a new sponsor. Time is not on their side!
However what I find absurd and totally out of line was the demand by fans and/or supporters that called on the RBM Governor to resign for pulling the plug on sponsorship! Excuse me but where on earth do they get the mandate to call for his head? He explained that the central bank is not in the business of running a football team. He has put his facts on the table and they make proper business sense. Can the supporters give more convincing facts for the governor to resign other than the feeble excuse that previous governors continued to sponsor the team? If they can't I would advise them to use their remaining energies on fund raising or finding a new sponsor. Time is not on their side!
Thursday, September 6, 2007
Symptoms of insanity
There is a saying that when you see a person carrying pot and pans around a village, that person is on the verge of going mad. And there is no better way to explain the former presidents behaviour other than that of a man on the verge. He has been carrying around iron sheets, bags of cement, buckets, bars of soap, you name it to his public rallies. The aim? To tell the people that commodity prices have gone through the roof during Bingu's reign unlike under his corrupt rule! Well ministry of commerce has published figures and statics to show that his understanding of economics is very shallow.
But what has really made me laugh was his pronouncement in the lake district of Mangochi that the district does not need the maize silo's government has just built because they are a fishing community. Now I have not heard such a feeble statement in a long time but it does not surprise me at all. After all it was under his rule that people starved after government sold of strategic grain reserves to Kenya when there were clear indications of poor rainfall that year.
Symptoms of insanity couldn't be more clearer!!
But what has really made me laugh was his pronouncement in the lake district of Mangochi that the district does not need the maize silo's government has just built because they are a fishing community. Now I have not heard such a feeble statement in a long time but it does not surprise me at all. After all it was under his rule that people starved after government sold of strategic grain reserves to Kenya when there were clear indications of poor rainfall that year.
Symptoms of insanity couldn't be more clearer!!
Friday, August 31, 2007
EPL/GTV deal stinks
It has slowly and painfully settled in that we will only watch some one or two English premiership games a week from the usual wide selection we used to have in previous seasons. Some people are happy that the Multichoice/DSTv monopoly has finally been broken. I am one who advocates healthy competition. So yeah, time has finally caught up with DSTv, lets see how they deal with it - DSTV in Uganda is reported to have reduced their equipment prices. Others have argued that it is time we watched more of our local leagues or African leagues. I have no problem with that either even though I have a right to choose what I watch wether it be the English, Indian, Jamaican or Nigerian league. I can however say that I am developing an interest in the PSL namely in Kaizer Chiefs, Supersport United, Orlando Pirates and Mamelodo Sundowns. I am actually trying very hard to get a Sundowns jersey to replace my old Liverpool one.
However, I sense something very fishy. We hear that GTV made a bid many times more than what Multichoice offered who also turned in a bid some six times more than last season. So the English Premier League (EPL) was carried away with the cash offer? They have flatly denied that. So what is it then? GTV is only operational in Kenya, Tanzania and Uganda. Others say they are in Burundi, Botswana and/or Mauritius. This means some 42+ countries are being denied coverage of this league. To add insult to injury, GTV Uganda is failing miserably to meet demand. Some 1,000 paid up customers last week could not get the service because the decoders and other accessories had run out. What should we expect when they eventually come to Malawi? When will they eventually come to Malawi should be the question? The GTV website does not state clearly as to when the service will be operational but other web sites have indicated some countries only being connected as late as mid 2008!!
So what really drove EPL to grant majority beaming rights to a company only present in 4 or 5 or 6 African countries out of 48 it is supposed to beam in? Mmmmm, whats that smell?
Thursday, August 30, 2007
MBC unethical?
Bakili Muluzi seems to be a man on the brink. I can see a large pile of hair on the floor of his BCA residence, hair he has pulled off of his head. All his 'hard work' over the past decade seems to be crumbling before his eyes. Inflation figures don't seem to have enough zero's on the end. Roads don't seem to have enough potholes in them. Politically motivated violence seems to have ceased. People seem to have more than enough to eat. All these are very bad, evil indicators that seem to be causing the old man so much distress that he is now spewing all sorts of half thought out statements, statements very contradictory to what the old man used to say when in power.
Fortunately he is not being help by the Malawi Broadcasting Corporation (MBC) formerly known as the Muluzi Broadcasting Corporation. The corporation, when under his control, recorded and archived all his public speeches. And boy are there many speeches from many trips he made around the country almost every other day in the last days of his presidency. Today, every time he makes a half thought out statement, MBC goes on to replay a speech from back in the day that is in stark contrast with his present days speech. MBC is also reminding us all how untruthful certain people can be when things just don't seem to be going their way. MBC are reminding us just how far certain people will bend the truth to try in a desperate attempt to get back into power. MBC is reminding us just how certain people are so blinded by greed they can't seem to see the message so clearly written for them on the wall.
The other day some people were arguing saying it is unethical for MBC to replay such speeches. Some said it was not after all they were public statements. My take? I say it is totally unethical to take one stand today and then take a totally different the next!
Fortunately he is not being help by the Malawi Broadcasting Corporation (MBC) formerly known as the Muluzi Broadcasting Corporation. The corporation, when under his control, recorded and archived all his public speeches. And boy are there many speeches from many trips he made around the country almost every other day in the last days of his presidency. Today, every time he makes a half thought out statement, MBC goes on to replay a speech from back in the day that is in stark contrast with his present days speech. MBC is also reminding us all how untruthful certain people can be when things just don't seem to be going their way. MBC are reminding us just how far certain people will bend the truth to try in a desperate attempt to get back into power. MBC is reminding us just how certain people are so blinded by greed they can't seem to see the message so clearly written for them on the wall.
The other day some people were arguing saying it is unethical for MBC to replay such speeches. Some said it was not after all they were public statements. My take? I say it is totally unethical to take one stand today and then take a totally different the next!
Wednesday, August 15, 2007
UDF, make up your mind
On Tuesday and Wednesday this week government and opposition parliamentarians respectively started debating the 2007-2008 national budget. I thank God for that, He truly listens to the cries of His people.
During his response to the budget, UDF's Friday Jumbe amongst other things praised the finance minister for 'sustaining donor confidence as donor support was crucial for Malawi'. This statement is in stark contrast to a press statement from UDF that called on donors to pull the plug on aid.
My question is which is which? I believe in both instances it was UDF speaking. Please make up your mind, you are confusing us!
During his response to the budget, UDF's Friday Jumbe amongst other things praised the finance minister for 'sustaining donor confidence as donor support was crucial for Malawi'. This statement is in stark contrast to a press statement from UDF that called on donors to pull the plug on aid.
My question is which is which? I believe in both instances it was UDF speaking. Please make up your mind, you are confusing us!
Monday, August 13, 2007
minibus fuel & mobile airtime
Since the introduction of mini buses in Malawi, people have been able to get around and droop off pretty much anywhere they want. That is the major advantage of mini buses. There are plenty things however that I don't like like smelly arm pits of the conductors or tight chairs especially for daddy-long-legs like some of us or having a bag of dried fish being placed on your lap. But you come to accept that as part of commuter life. There is one thing however that I don't like and still can't understand and it is the bus running out of fuel. What is even more surprising it that once the conductor jumps out with his jerry can, he will only buy a litre or two of the pink energy. Definitely that bus will run out of fuel very soon. Why they insist on driving with a few drops of fuel remains a mystery. One colleague when further to ask the driver 'mukayika fuel wambiri mukuwona ngati ma passenger ife timwa?' (You think we passengers will drink the fuel if you put in a considerable amount?). The question/comment did not faze the driver.
Minibus owners, driver and conductors aside, I have come to learn of a new breed of people who do exactly what these formers do - mobile phone users. They will buy 50 units or 100 units of airtime and load it into their phones. They will then make a call which will cut within seconds because they have exhausted their credit. They will then either pull out another top up card from their pocket or signal to a vendor to bring some more airtime. If you watch them carefully, they will have a couple hundreds or thousands of Kwacha's in their pockets and make a couple of phone calls but stubbornly insist on loading the airtime 'a litre or two' at a time!!
Minibus owners, driver and conductors aside, I have come to learn of a new breed of people who do exactly what these formers do - mobile phone users. They will buy 50 units or 100 units of airtime and load it into their phones. They will then make a call which will cut within seconds because they have exhausted their credit. They will then either pull out another top up card from their pocket or signal to a vendor to bring some more airtime. If you watch them carefully, they will have a couple hundreds or thousands of Kwacha's in their pockets and make a couple of phone calls but stubbornly insist on loading the airtime 'a litre or two' at a time!!
Thursday, August 9, 2007
Politicians, licence fees and Macra
There has been general discontent in the ICT industry about high fees that the Malawi Communications Regulatory Authority (Macra) charge. In yesterdays Nation newspaper, I read an article to the effect that MIJ Radio was asking Macra to reduce radio license fees as the high fees make it difficult for radio stations to operate.
MIJ got an immediate response from the information minister. The minister said that Macra can't reduce the fees because the radios are being used by politicians and not advocating development. The minister warned that if the trend (of politicians using the radios) continues, Macra may even increase the fees!!
I beg to ask what the connection is between politicians using the radio stations and license fees? Maybe am too stupid to see the connection! Maybe there is no connection at all! Or maybe we are out to punish certain individuals and all the others are part of the collateral damage. It beats me, it really does, trying to establish connections!!
MIJ got an immediate response from the information minister. The minister said that Macra can't reduce the fees because the radios are being used by politicians and not advocating development. The minister warned that if the trend (of politicians using the radios) continues, Macra may even increase the fees!!
I beg to ask what the connection is between politicians using the radio stations and license fees? Maybe am too stupid to see the connection! Maybe there is no connection at all! Or maybe we are out to punish certain individuals and all the others are part of the collateral damage. It beats me, it really does, trying to establish connections!!
Tuesday, August 7, 2007
End the stupidity
Yesterday saw the stakes being raised in the current 'political madness', as Zodiak Radio is calling it. Two people, calling themselves representatives of the people, sought and were granted a court injunction preventing parliament from meeting and discussing the budget. The domino effect of this action was violence. Two other 'MPs' bore the brunt of angry student action. They suffered injuries as a result of stone throwing and were admitted to hospital, so we learn. Now get me right here, I don't condone violence. Neither do I condone stupidity. But I foresee a future where if this stupidity of trying to bring government to it's knees continues, so will the violence!! The sad part is that what we saw yesterday could just be the tip of the iceberg.
Monday, August 6, 2007
Kufunsira
A friend of mine has just asked his girlfriend to marry him and he was asking me the procedure from here on. That question reminded me of the time I asked my girlfriend to marry me.
Normally what would have happened was for me to simply tell an uncle to go an meet her uncle to formalise everything. In this case, my girlfriends uncle asked for a letter! I found it strange but what was this poor boy supposed to do. I pondered over it for a few days. I finally decided to jot a draft. After many drafts and loss of much hair I could barely come up with more than three lines without sounding like I was applying for job. The next headache was what to write this letter on. On A4 paper? How would I put three lines on an A4. If I had one elaborate signature I would have filled the space with it but mine is a very small, miserable one. Should I tear out a leaf from a primary school note book? Where would I find a primary school note book? And would it not look too cheap? At the end of the day I found something and wrote my letter.
Unfortunately this was over eight years ago and I didn't make a copy of it. I doubt I would be able to get the letter (for framing) because the recipient sadly passed away a couple of years ago. How I wish i kept a colour photocopy!
Normally what would have happened was for me to simply tell an uncle to go an meet her uncle to formalise everything. In this case, my girlfriends uncle asked for a letter! I found it strange but what was this poor boy supposed to do. I pondered over it for a few days. I finally decided to jot a draft. After many drafts and loss of much hair I could barely come up with more than three lines without sounding like I was applying for job. The next headache was what to write this letter on. On A4 paper? How would I put three lines on an A4. If I had one elaborate signature I would have filled the space with it but mine is a very small, miserable one. Should I tear out a leaf from a primary school note book? Where would I find a primary school note book? And would it not look too cheap? At the end of the day I found something and wrote my letter.
Unfortunately this was over eight years ago and I didn't make a copy of it. I doubt I would be able to get the letter (for framing) because the recipient sadly passed away a couple of years ago. How I wish i kept a colour photocopy!
Wednesday, August 1, 2007
Lets fight this devil called spam
A few days ago a certain gentleman who was resigning from a certain organisation sent out email informing people about his resignation. He sent this email to 254 different email addresses and put all these email addresses under TO:. A few people found it fit to thank this gentleman for the good work he had done. For some reason, they decided to press the REPLY TO ALL button and showered this man with praises. For me that was over the top but I ignored it as on of those things you do when you had a bit too much the previous night.
Today I receive another email from one of the above reply-to-all-trigger-happy people. What was it this time around? A hoax!
Now come on. In the first place, people should learn to take the time to investigate these things. This particular email said there will be two moons on August 27. Guys, firstly there can never be two moons unless of course it's in your dreams or you had one too many again (as above). Secondly there is no year indicated in the email when these 'two moons' will appear. Such omissions are the first signs of a hoax. Secondly exposing so many email addresses can increase the risk of them being harvested by spammers and I hate spam. I detest spam. So firstly you receive spam and then you are at risk of being exposed to further spam. Darn!
It's time people woke up to the reality that just because you and me were addressed in the same email address does not mean we are buddies and therefore should not send each other silly emails. If you have problems making friends, try going to the bottle stores at Bwandilo and buying a drink for everyone there. You will be sure to make a friend or two. Just repeat the gesture one week later and you will be on the right track!
Today I receive another email from one of the above reply-to-all-trigger-happy people. What was it this time around? A hoax!
Now come on. In the first place, people should learn to take the time to investigate these things. This particular email said there will be two moons on August 27. Guys, firstly there can never be two moons unless of course it's in your dreams or you had one too many again (as above). Secondly there is no year indicated in the email when these 'two moons' will appear. Such omissions are the first signs of a hoax. Secondly exposing so many email addresses can increase the risk of them being harvested by spammers and I hate spam. I detest spam. So firstly you receive spam and then you are at risk of being exposed to further spam. Darn!
It's time people woke up to the reality that just because you and me were addressed in the same email address does not mean we are buddies and therefore should not send each other silly emails. If you have problems making friends, try going to the bottle stores at Bwandilo and buying a drink for everyone there. You will be sure to make a friend or two. Just repeat the gesture one week later and you will be on the right track!
Tuesday, July 31, 2007
Since MP's 'think' like their leaders...
Oops, sorry. Members of Parliament don't think, at least the majority don't. They are dictated to by their leaders. They have to tow the line of the leader. So if this is the case, why does MCP have to have some 50+ MP's if they are all going to be dictated to by John Tembo. Why not have John Tembo to represent the whole MCP and save costs on the 50 others. If all UDF MP's are going to think like Bakili Muluzi, why have all 40+ MP's when Gorge Mtafu can adequately do the job in addition to spewing all the profanity he can. Why have over 70 MP's representing the DPP when they all think like Bingu. Let Henry Chimuthu Banda represent the whole DPP then we save on paying others. Hey, if only three peoples views are advanced and 'discussed' in parliament and not the 12 million Malawians views why have parliament in the first place???
Tuesday, July 24, 2007
Lets see them, gentlemen!
in northeastern Uganda there is an area called Karamoja inhabited by semi-nomadic herdsmen called Karimojong. Life amongst these herdsmen has largely remained unchanged for thousands of years. They reject western culture, dress and technology amongst other things. The some men of the community are known not to dress and walk around with their manhood exposed. As a result of this manhood not being restrained in tight clothing, the size is certain cases tend to be 'generous', if it can be put that way. I would like to think that those with generous sized manhoods get treated with dignity befitting their size.
Back home we have a number of gentlemen who call themselves parliamentarians and politicians. They also would like to get undue dignity and respect but in this case for doing nothing but throwing spanners in the works of the country. I have one appeal to these 'honourable' gentlemen. Strip please! Lets see them! Lets see who are the real gentlemen here. Most likely none would emerge!
Back home we have a number of gentlemen who call themselves parliamentarians and politicians. They also would like to get undue dignity and respect but in this case for doing nothing but throwing spanners in the works of the country. I have one appeal to these 'honourable' gentlemen. Strip please! Lets see them! Lets see who are the real gentlemen here. Most likely none would emerge!
Risking it all
As the Sec. 65/Budget wrangle continues to rear it's ugly head questions are being asked where this whole comedy gone bad will take us. The country is being held at ransom by politicians who's egos are apparently and unfortunately bigger than their brains. Personal interests are at stake yet the whole country is being dragged into this useless, unnecessary and avoidable impasse. Is all this worth it? Mayo dziko langa lija, lapita kwa agalu!
Tuesday, July 17, 2007
fare thee well Kinnah
Once upon a time there was a great footballer by the name of Kinnah Phiri. He played a great many games for his beloved country Malawi and help it win a few accolades. He then trekked down to Swaziland to work on his coaching career. After a great many years he returned back home to mentor the young chaps at Bata Bullets or Bakili Bullets or Big Bullets, what ever they are called now. Lets just say BB. He was drafted into the caretaker team coaching the Malawi National Team. At the same time he brokered a deal worth some K60m for BB from an obscure South African company owned by Malawian twins.
Then everything seemed to come tumbling down on him. The K60m deal crumbled under false promises and unfulfilled commitments. The new expatriate coach of the national team booted him out in favour of a chap with much less experience than him. Then he went to the press to whine and moan about being dropped by the expariate coach like a sulking baby.
Happily for me he was suddenly whisked away by South African premier outfit Free State Stars to mentor the boys there. Oh, am so happy for him! So am I happy to get to hear much less of him! Fare thee well Kinnah!
Then everything seemed to come tumbling down on him. The K60m deal crumbled under false promises and unfulfilled commitments. The new expatriate coach of the national team booted him out in favour of a chap with much less experience than him. Then he went to the press to whine and moan about being dropped by the expariate coach like a sulking baby.
Happily for me he was suddenly whisked away by South African premier outfit Free State Stars to mentor the boys there. Oh, am so happy for him! So am I happy to get to hear much less of him! Fare thee well Kinnah!
Monday, July 9, 2007
(Pleasant) Surprises
The last weekend pulled up two surprises
Surprise 1 - Embattled vice president Cassim Chilumpha pulled one when he attended this years Independence Celebrations. During the first lady's funeral last month, there were plenty calls for renewed unity amongst politicians in the country. So far it is only Chilumpha who has heeded that that call so far. However he may have a different reason altogether for warming up to government. His very party, UDF, would like to see the back of him by impeaching him and his boss. He has found himself trapped between the devil and the deep blue sea. Talk about being embattled!
Surprise 2 - Another vice president pulled one too. VP and spokesperson of the MCP Nicholas Dausi ditched his party and joined the 'ruling' DPP. Now that was a surprise I found very hard to believe. He cited reasons of Section 65 and Bingu's recognition of Kamuzu as main reasons. I see many more reasons that I will rather keep to myself. Interestingly the MCP is finding Dausi's departure very hard to swallow. They say his departure is good riddance to waste stuff! Sour grapes perhaps?
Surprise 1 - Embattled vice president Cassim Chilumpha pulled one when he attended this years Independence Celebrations. During the first lady's funeral last month, there were plenty calls for renewed unity amongst politicians in the country. So far it is only Chilumpha who has heeded that that call so far. However he may have a different reason altogether for warming up to government. His very party, UDF, would like to see the back of him by impeaching him and his boss. He has found himself trapped between the devil and the deep blue sea. Talk about being embattled!
Surprise 2 - Another vice president pulled one too. VP and spokesperson of the MCP Nicholas Dausi ditched his party and joined the 'ruling' DPP. Now that was a surprise I found very hard to believe. He cited reasons of Section 65 and Bingu's recognition of Kamuzu as main reasons. I see many more reasons that I will rather keep to myself. Interestingly the MCP is finding Dausi's departure very hard to swallow. They say his departure is good riddance to waste stuff! Sour grapes perhaps?
Thursday, July 5, 2007
Jungle Savages
Last night I was shocked to hear the language used in our Parliament. One legislator was overheard shouting 'Eh, agalu inu mukuti chani?' (Hey, you dogs, what are you saying?). It is believed the same legislator was then overheard shouting to the government bench 'You must be stupid'. I am made to believe the voice of both those unfortunate outbursts was that of 'Hon' Dr George Nga Ntafu, a neurosurgeon by profession. There were other outbursts of unsavory language heard in the background.
Now if this behavior is not that of stone age jungle savages (if indeed such savages exist. If they did't, they have now been discovered in Malawi), then tell me what is!
Now if this behavior is not that of stone age jungle savages (if indeed such savages exist. If they did't, they have now been discovered in Malawi), then tell me what is!
Chimpeni is back
A few months ago I lamented the disappearance of one aChimpeni. Well folks, he is back with a vengeance. I urge him to find a good 3 tonner truck specially for Area 15. He will make a killing there ... literally!
Wednesday, July 4, 2007
Who are the real Saboteurs?
Parliament has been suspended again. What a shame! Our politicians fail the see the writing on the wall that the people want them to put differences behind them for the common good of the country. Both camps have been pointing fingers at the other. My question is Who are the real saboteurs in this issue? The Government or the Opposition? My take? Both!
Monday, June 25, 2007
Not again!!
For the past few weeks following the death of the first lady, there were calls from various sections of society for the goodwill displayed around the funeral to continue. Plenty people also commented that good would come out of all of it. I was one of those hoping good would come out but somehow I was not optimistic.
Then last week after the Sec 65 ruling, daggers were drawn. Almost all party's demanded the heads of certain parliamentarians. For me this was the first sign of that goodwill evaporating.
Today it's that story again - Impeachment. Only this time it's targeting more than just Bingu!
Now someone point out the unity that Government, John Tembo and others preached about during the mourning period! Where is this madness going to take us?
Someone said two weeks ago that Malawians are like Somali's. We rise up together, united against a common enemy. Once that enemy has been defeated, we go straight back to fighting each other. One would think that poverty, infighting, greed, injustice and jealousy are our common enemies. I have concluded only death is, sadly!
God save our nation from our real enemies - our greedy insensitive politicians!
Then last week after the Sec 65 ruling, daggers were drawn. Almost all party's demanded the heads of certain parliamentarians. For me this was the first sign of that goodwill evaporating.
Today it's that story again - Impeachment. Only this time it's targeting more than just Bingu!
Now someone point out the unity that Government, John Tembo and others preached about during the mourning period! Where is this madness going to take us?
Someone said two weeks ago that Malawians are like Somali's. We rise up together, united against a common enemy. Once that enemy has been defeated, we go straight back to fighting each other. One would think that poverty, infighting, greed, injustice and jealousy are our common enemies. I have concluded only death is, sadly!
God save our nation from our real enemies - our greedy insensitive politicians!
Friday, May 25, 2007
Ill Health
Most times in the press you hear of petty thieves pleading for mercy in court rooms because of ill health on their part which most times are rejected by magistrates and judges. They are simply told that if they knew of their predicament, they would not have pick pocketed old women.
However, I have noticed that their is a certain breed of petty thieves, those who prey on the poor while holding high offices who seem to get away with this argument. The most recent case in question is that of the former president next door in Zambia. He has asked the state not to prosecute him until a panel of doctors determines if he is fit to stand trial. How fit do you have to be to stand trial? In the first case why do you have to be fit? So many other petty thieves, who plundered on a much smaller scale, don't get accorded that luxury. So why them?
However, I have noticed that their is a certain breed of petty thieves, those who prey on the poor while holding high offices who seem to get away with this argument. The most recent case in question is that of the former president next door in Zambia. He has asked the state not to prosecute him until a panel of doctors determines if he is fit to stand trial. How fit do you have to be to stand trial? In the first case why do you have to be fit? So many other petty thieves, who plundered on a much smaller scale, don't get accorded that luxury. So why them?
Tuesday, May 22, 2007
Magic number
I went to some computer shop today to buy some RJ45 connectors. After a while some guy walks in and ask's for a catalogue as he would like to buy a couple of things for some project. The sales lady says they do have one but have currently run out. Anyways the sales lady agrees to take him around the show room.
He: How much is this?'
She: 'K55,000'
He: 'and this printer?'
She: 'K55,000'
He: 'and this?'
She: 'K65,000'
He: 'and this UPS?'
She: 'K55,000'
He: 'I also have a laptop that has a virus on it. How much will it cost to get it sorted out? K55,000 I guess since everything in here seems to cost K55,000!'
Rude man!
He: How much is this?'
She: 'K55,000'
He: 'and this printer?'
She: 'K55,000'
He: 'and this?'
She: 'K65,000'
He: 'and this UPS?'
She: 'K55,000'
He: 'I also have a laptop that has a virus on it. How much will it cost to get it sorted out? K55,000 I guess since everything in here seems to cost K55,000!'
Rude man!
Friday, May 18, 2007
Farewell Mr Wolfowitz
So finally he has 'decided' to go. What was so difficult about that, I wonder? I guess the same thing Robert Mugabe and Bakili Muluzi and all the others who cling to power find hard to do too. Maybe when Paul Wolfowitz next sits down for tea with George Bush, he could give some insight into this contagious power hungry disease afflicting so many African, err..., world leaders.
Tuesday, May 15, 2007
Load shedding driving me nuts
For the most part 2007, ESCOM has been load shedding for one reason or another. It’s either they are fixing screens damaged by trash in the Shire river or repairing a turbine that was damaged during flooding in the power station or rehabilitations works or some other excuse. Frankly speaking, am sick and tired of load shedding and so are numerous other people. Escom to should get it’s house order and simply provide the power. Why not import power from Mozambique? After all Caborra Basa is under generating.
One other thing that gets me thinking is why people are not thinking of alternate means of sourcing power. There are plenty property developments taking place all over the country and these people are waiting to tap into Escoms power grid, the very same grid that is failing to provide ‘Power All Day, Every Day’ to it’s current clientele. How about solar? Some people have argued that initial investment in a solar powered system is expensive. I will argue that a K300,000 investment into a house that will cost you K11m to build sounds reasonable, after all there are very few, if any, recurrent monthly costs. Others have argued that during a few days of bad weather the system does not work properly. I will argue that our friends in Europe have longer spells of bad weather yet they have fully harnessed the solar powered system. How about wind power?
Now am no expert in alternative power sources but I really think we should have embraced these technologies some time back. Escom are a big let down and I don’t see them getting any better.
One other thing that gets me thinking is why people are not thinking of alternate means of sourcing power. There are plenty property developments taking place all over the country and these people are waiting to tap into Escoms power grid, the very same grid that is failing to provide ‘Power All Day, Every Day’ to it’s current clientele. How about solar? Some people have argued that initial investment in a solar powered system is expensive. I will argue that a K300,000 investment into a house that will cost you K11m to build sounds reasonable, after all there are very few, if any, recurrent monthly costs. Others have argued that during a few days of bad weather the system does not work properly. I will argue that our friends in Europe have longer spells of bad weather yet they have fully harnessed the solar powered system. How about wind power?
Now am no expert in alternative power sources but I really think we should have embraced these technologies some time back. Escom are a big let down and I don’t see them getting any better.
Tuesday, May 8, 2007
Rats
Early this morning i walked into some office and waited patiently to be served. While I sat there, some man walked out of the office with two mouse traps that had successfully reduced the rat population by two. Later he walked back in, mouse traps empty much to my joy. My joy was short lived however when i was driving out to find that the rats had just been thrown onto the road outside. Now how unhygienic can one get? Who does expect to pick up his mes for him? Anthu ena ngosaphunzitsika!
Thursday, May 3, 2007
Locals being milked?
Recently in the news, Illovo Sugar Malawi reported that it had made K6.8 billion pre-tax profit. After tax profit was K4.8 billion up from K2.8 billion in the previous year. It is reported elsewhere that Illovo Malawi contributed the most to Illovo Groups profits ahead of all the others (South Africa, Zambia, Mozambique, Tanzania and Swaziland).
Now someone tell me that local Malawians are not being riped off by Illovo! In the next few months, I bet, Illovo will increase their sugar prices 'due to rising production costs' yet they are making such obscene profits on the backs of the poor. Shame!
Now someone tell me that local Malawians are not being riped off by Illovo! In the next few months, I bet, Illovo will increase their sugar prices 'due to rising production costs' yet they are making such obscene profits on the backs of the poor. Shame!
Thursday, April 19, 2007
The blame game
Yesterday Zimbabwe celebrated 27 years of independence and what an occasion this presented to President Robert Mugabe to lash out at his enemies, imaginary or not. He attributed the countries economic woes to unbridled greed amongst business persons, saboteurs, misguided opposition elements, British colonialists ..... he blamed everyone. Funny enough he took none of the blame. It really baffles me how this blame game is played!
Minister warns web developers, ISP's
There is an article in the Nation newspaper today suggesting that government wants to censor the internet in Malawi although Govt has denied it. The article goes on further to say forums like Nyasanet, Malawi Talk and Nyasa Times are the main target of this censorship and that Govt wants to send specialists for training to implement the censorship. Information minister has denied all this but went on the caution web developers and internet service providers to watch what they publish.
Could someone kindly inform the honourable information minster that web developers and ISP's are not responsible for a web sites content.
Could someone kindly inform the honourable information minster that web developers and ISP's are not responsible for a web sites content.
Wednesday, April 4, 2007
Send SMS's for FREE!!
Thats the message we shall soon be receiving from the cellphone providers over here. Sending an sms used to cost around 12 cents or 12 units as they like to call it these days. Then one provider went down to 8 units? I think. Then the other followed and went down to 7. Then the other went down to 2 units. The other has now come down to 5 units. Next week I predict (and am taking bets) that the 2 units one will allow us to send sms's for free.
Meanwhile those of us who use our phones properly i.e. make phone calls, anxiously await the day they shall reduce calling rates!
Meanwhile those of us who use our phones properly i.e. make phone calls, anxiously await the day they shall reduce calling rates!
Monday, March 26, 2007
bank driving me up the wall!!
I have been a faithful customer at National Bank for over a decade now, I think, and I can say that am generally happy with the services am offered there. I take issue with one or two things but thats only natural. Recently I had wanted to get a loan and decided to take it through my bank as usual but my employer would not provide the letter of undertaking because she thought I better take it through another bank my employer has an account with. After much resistance I went to get the loan there and within a few minutes I had the cash in hand but this was after I had to open an account. Fair deal!
Soon after opening the account, I was quickly approached by some lady in the banking hall (not sure what her title should be) who had me sign ATM card forms. No problem, I love ATM cards. I was told the card would be ready in two weeks time. They promptly deducted K500 from my account for the card. I checked after 2 weeks, no card, after another 2 weeks, no card. Apparently the machine had broken down since the 1st of January. After 3 weeks still no card. After another 2-3 weeks, I finally found the cards had come but it could not be given to me because they had just arrived and they needed to check my picture, my name and account number to make sure they correspond! Fine, then check those details while am here! nope, I was told to come back the next day. From past experience, I didn't go the next day - maybe the machine that verifies those details also went down on the 1st of February, you never know. I went a week later and was promptly given my card in some poxy plastic pouch to which i was told they would deduct K100 from my account for it. I told them to keep the pouch, i'd put the card in my wallet to which the lady responded it will break because other people's cards have been breaking. So I told her it's the card quality then because I have had numerous cards from National Bank, Commercial Bank, my driving license and other cards in my wallet for years and they have never snapped or broken. She quickly said that if I don't sit properly at the pub it could break! (And how does this person know I go to pubs to drink? She's a witch! Burn her!). I told her I don't need her pouch to which she said she would just give it to me! (please give one each to everyone else on the line behind me too). She then directed me to get my pin from another desk where the woman there could not find my pin! At this point I was starting to pull my hair out. When the young lady can in to intervene, she promptly found my pin, handled it over to and said the card will only start working the next day!!! Sure, I've waited for three months, another day can't be that bad!!!!
Be on the lookout for such banks, they will drive you nuts!!
Soon after opening the account, I was quickly approached by some lady in the banking hall (not sure what her title should be) who had me sign ATM card forms. No problem, I love ATM cards. I was told the card would be ready in two weeks time. They promptly deducted K500 from my account for the card. I checked after 2 weeks, no card, after another 2 weeks, no card. Apparently the machine had broken down since the 1st of January. After 3 weeks still no card. After another 2-3 weeks, I finally found the cards had come but it could not be given to me because they had just arrived and they needed to check my picture, my name and account number to make sure they correspond! Fine, then check those details while am here! nope, I was told to come back the next day. From past experience, I didn't go the next day - maybe the machine that verifies those details also went down on the 1st of February, you never know. I went a week later and was promptly given my card in some poxy plastic pouch to which i was told they would deduct K100 from my account for it. I told them to keep the pouch, i'd put the card in my wallet to which the lady responded it will break because other people's cards have been breaking. So I told her it's the card quality then because I have had numerous cards from National Bank, Commercial Bank, my driving license and other cards in my wallet for years and they have never snapped or broken. She quickly said that if I don't sit properly at the pub it could break! (And how does this person know I go to pubs to drink? She's a witch! Burn her!). I told her I don't need her pouch to which she said she would just give it to me! (please give one each to everyone else on the line behind me too). She then directed me to get my pin from another desk where the woman there could not find my pin! At this point I was starting to pull my hair out. When the young lady can in to intervene, she promptly found my pin, handled it over to and said the card will only start working the next day!!! Sure, I've waited for three months, another day can't be that bad!!!!
Be on the lookout for such banks, they will drive you nuts!!
Monday, March 12, 2007
Put it back where you found it!
Don't you just hate those people who come to your desk, pick up a book, flip through it then just toss it back onto your desk! I mean, Hey, where did they leave their manners? Up a tree? Put things back where you find them. I didn't put the book where it was for no reason, moron!
Thursday, March 1, 2007
Naija movies
The other day I took a road trip to South Africa via Linking Africa coach. We left at 10am and were immediately served with hot lunch which i kept but which some guy quickly helped himself too, found much needed strength and kept the bus entertained until Mwanza border post, some 1 hour+ away. Once we entered Mozambique, he slept like a baby while we chewed on our now cold chips and chicken!! I now saw the sense in his madness.
Anyway with him quietly sleeping away I thought I was in for a peaceful ride until the next border post. Nope! The hostess decided it was time to watch a Naija (Nigerian) movie titled Billionaire's Club. Now am not one to watch a west african movie but the view of the dense thicket outside the window was not that exciting either. Coupled with all the shouting and screaming associated with Naija movies, I was forced to watch. Now check this out, the Mozambique stretch is some 3 - 4 hours and I tell you the movie dragged through all this time until we got to the Zimbabwe border where the film seemed to end. After the border formalities we left and guess what? The hostess slotted in a movie conveniently titled Billionaire's Club Part 2!!! SOMEONE PLEASE SHOOT ME!!!! Well, at least throw me off the bus!! I can't stand this any longer. If I had hair, I tell you I would have arrived in Harare bold. And boy did the second part drag as much as the first part. Luckily the film ended before Harare, after that we slept and woke up at the South African border. From there we were entertained to some Malawian music video's, which was okay, to say it mildly. After our stay, we gladly jumped back on the Linking Africa coach and guess what movie they put in?? Take one good guess. Yup! Yup! PLEASE SHOOT ME!!! PLEEEEAAASSE!!
I took that trip some 2 years and would have imagined that with time Nollywood would have matured from long dragging films, screaming, shouting and the large number of people who turn into snakes and other strange creatures. Nope! 3 days ago I happened 'to catch' the last 40 minutes of a Naija film. Boy oh boy! Shock horror!! No difference at all. But you should have seen the lady I found watching the film. She was over the moon and must have wished the 3 hour long movie had not come to an end.
Anyway with him quietly sleeping away I thought I was in for a peaceful ride until the next border post. Nope! The hostess decided it was time to watch a Naija (Nigerian) movie titled Billionaire's Club. Now am not one to watch a west african movie but the view of the dense thicket outside the window was not that exciting either. Coupled with all the shouting and screaming associated with Naija movies, I was forced to watch. Now check this out, the Mozambique stretch is some 3 - 4 hours and I tell you the movie dragged through all this time until we got to the Zimbabwe border where the film seemed to end. After the border formalities we left and guess what? The hostess slotted in a movie conveniently titled Billionaire's Club Part 2!!! SOMEONE PLEASE SHOOT ME!!!! Well, at least throw me off the bus!! I can't stand this any longer. If I had hair, I tell you I would have arrived in Harare bold. And boy did the second part drag as much as the first part. Luckily the film ended before Harare, after that we slept and woke up at the South African border. From there we were entertained to some Malawian music video's, which was okay, to say it mildly. After our stay, we gladly jumped back on the Linking Africa coach and guess what movie they put in?? Take one good guess. Yup! Yup! PLEASE SHOOT ME!!! PLEEEEAAASSE!!
I took that trip some 2 years and would have imagined that with time Nollywood would have matured from long dragging films, screaming, shouting and the large number of people who turn into snakes and other strange creatures. Nope! 3 days ago I happened 'to catch' the last 40 minutes of a Naija film. Boy oh boy! Shock horror!! No difference at all. But you should have seen the lady I found watching the film. She was over the moon and must have wished the 3 hour long movie had not come to an end.
Reinvent aChimpeni
A long time ago there used to be this radio advert from the veterinary division warning people that aChimpeni would be in a particular area shooting stray dogs. It advised people to always keep dogs on a chain or in an enclosure. It went further to warn people that aChimpeni would blow his whistle twice (adzayimba pinto kawiri asanawombere) before shooting just in case he caught someones leg instead of the dogs neck. Well a decade or more has passed since I heard that advert. I can also safely assume the same period of time has elapsed since any dogs were shot because these creatures seem to be a nuisance now more than ever before especially in Lilongwe. And for you to witness this first hand, just drive through Area 15 and see for yourself.
They are everywhere in large numbers too. They will either be a large group following a female dog. Or they will be fighting and chasing each other. The other day I found one taking a crap right in the middle of the road!! How cheeky!! He was bloody lucky my car does not have a bullbar, I would have knocked some sense into him.
But honestly, these dogs are a menace to society. They pose a threat to pedestrians, cyclists and motorists alike. They need to be retrained and the only person I feel can do that is our beloved Mr. Chipeni and his greener (maybe an Ak-47 would be more efficient in this day and age)!!
They are everywhere in large numbers too. They will either be a large group following a female dog. Or they will be fighting and chasing each other. The other day I found one taking a crap right in the middle of the road!! How cheeky!! He was bloody lucky my car does not have a bullbar, I would have knocked some sense into him.
But honestly, these dogs are a menace to society. They pose a threat to pedestrians, cyclists and motorists alike. They need to be retrained and the only person I feel can do that is our beloved Mr. Chipeni and his greener (maybe an Ak-47 would be more efficient in this day and age)!!
Monday, February 26, 2007
Check those expiry labels carefully!!
on Sunday I went to a retail chain store with my wife looking for some juice for my son. She picked up the bottle but put it back saying there was no expiry date on it. I was confused because I could see a label but she insisted there was no date. On closer inspection I realised the date was like
2 -02-2007. The morons had removed the second number on the label. My innocent assumption? the product had expired on, say, the 20th and they scratched the date to conceal the date on the remaining bottles in order not to make a loss!! All this at the expense of our little kids who drink these products.. Shame!!
2 -02-2007. The morons had removed the second number on the label. My innocent assumption? the product had expired on, say, the 20th and they scratched the date to conceal the date on the remaining bottles in order not to make a loss!! All this at the expense of our little kids who drink these products.. Shame!!
Thursday, February 8, 2007
KIA car park permit
Have you ever taken time to look closely at your Kamuzu Intl. Airport parking permit? I do and it is always suspect. The cashier, on most occasions, makes sure he does not stamp the day in full on the ticket. why? So that on your way out, the guy at the exit of the park takes it, gives it back to the cashier so he can re-issue it. He can re-issue the ticket for a full 9 days before it becomes useless. Then on the 10th of February, he issues new tickets to be used for another 9 days. Then again on the 20th, the does the same thing. All along he is pocketing a number of K75's in a day.Don't believe me? Next time watch the cashier very closely. He rarely stamps the ticket while you are standing there, he will normally do it while you are walking up to the booth and tears it off before he receives your money. Then the lad at the exit gate simply confiscates your ticket. If you insist on getting it back, he puts a small tear in it.
Wednesday, January 31, 2007
Dumping dead bodies at work places
African society in general and Malawians in particular must be the people with most respect for the dead. They are showered with all sorts of praise once dead and their coffins are given utmost respect. However this respect gets eroded very quickly when you now take his/her body and dump it at workplace in the hope of forcing the organisation involved to provide coffins, transport and other goods or services. And not only is it disrespectful, it is simply wrong! How would those people who do that like to have their dead body lying at the dusty entrance to some factory or placed on the hard boardroom table of some company? Of course they would claim that they would not know but hey guys...!
The employee has to start to realise that in this day and age where people are dying at an accelerated rate (if I can put it that way), not all organisations can afford to transport spouses, children and members of extended families bodies too far away places simply to have people mourn for an hour or two then bury the person. Why can we simply inter bodies right where the person has died? Why take a four month baby and bury it in the village 400km away? Where is the logic? What is the reason? To sleep next to and chat with it's kinsfolk in the graveyard?
I've drifted off the point but the point it give the dead the respect they so rightly deserve!
The employee has to start to realise that in this day and age where people are dying at an accelerated rate (if I can put it that way), not all organisations can afford to transport spouses, children and members of extended families bodies too far away places simply to have people mourn for an hour or two then bury the person. Why can we simply inter bodies right where the person has died? Why take a four month baby and bury it in the village 400km away? Where is the logic? What is the reason? To sleep next to and chat with it's kinsfolk in the graveyard?
I've drifted off the point but the point it give the dead the respect they so rightly deserve!
Monday, January 22, 2007
Harnessing the Power of the Internets Collaboration Tools
The number of internet users in
Skype is a peer-to-peer Voice over IP (VoIP) network that allows users to make free voice and video conferencing calls over the internet. This means you can make free calls to other users, wherever they are in the world, but only to those who have also downloaded and installed the Skype software and have an earphone and microphone (headset) just like you. This means you can keep in constant touch, for free, with those friends in the diaspora or business contacts who will most likely have Skype installed on their pc’s. You can however make calls to traditional numbers and cell phones for a fee using SkypeOut. Quality of service is not guaranteed so expect dropouts and voice delays.
Another great tool is Google Docs & Spreadsheets, a Web-based word processor and spreadsheet application offered by Google. It allows users to upload or create documents and spreadsheets while inviting others to share or edit the documents together in real-time.
Documents can be uploaded or emailed in formats such as plain text or Word and later be exported as HTML, Word or PDF files. Spreadsheets can be uploaded or emailed in CSV, Excel, and OpenDocument formats and later be exported as HTML and PDF in addition to other formats. Docs & Spreadsheets include most word processing and spreadsheet features although other features lack. In addition to exporting your documents to your desktop in the formats above, you can send them by email, publish them online to the world or even post them to your blog. By being able to share the document amongst multiple users at the same time makes Google Docs & Spreadsheets a great collaboration tool.
Another product offered by Google is Google Calendar, a contact- and time-management web application. It allows users to synchronize their Gmail (Google's web e-mail service) contacts with a web-based calendar. The interface of Google Calendar is similar to desktop calendar applications such as Microsoft Outlook. The interface enables users to view, add and even drag-and-drop events from one date to another without reloading the page. It sports a variety of view modes, such as the weekly, monthly and agenda views. Users can set the number of days to show in their custom view mode. All events in a Google Calendar can be commented on by its users.
Events are stored online, so in the case of a user being away from his computer, he can still view the information. The application can import Microsoft Outlook calendar files (.cvs) although at this stage only when the fields are all in
Another tool that can be used by Malawian journalists and columnists to get across to those in the diaspora and invite immediate comments is a Blog. This is a user-generated website where entries are made in journal style and displayed in a reverse chronological order. They can focus on a particular subject such as sports, politics and local news or can simply be a personal online diary. The ability for readers to leave comments in an interactive format is an important part of many blogs. Some blogs are specialist and focus on photographs (photoblog), videos (vlog), or audio (podcasting) and are part of a wider network of social media. Blogs are free to use and the most common are Blogger, Blogit, LiveJournal and WordPress amongst plenty others.
Another tool widely used in
Are you one of those people who flood friends mail boxes every Monday morning with pictures of weddings, engagements and other events that took place over the past weekend? Photo sharing is the publishing or transfer of a user's digital photos online, thus enabling the user to share them with others (whether publicly or privately). This functionality is provided through websites that facilitate the upload and display of images. Sites that offer free photo sharing are Flickr, Fotki, Ringo, Webshots and MyPhotoAlbum amongst many others.
Thursday, January 18, 2007
Mangaliso's World is Over!
A good friend and fellow blogger, Mangaliso Jere, left this world today in Mzuzu! I really have no words to describe this brother only that he was a cheerful lad, a hardworking techie and one who loved his motherland. Rest in Peace Dear Brother!
Tuesday, January 16, 2007
Friday, January 12, 2007
obsessions
A psychiatrist was conducting a group therapy session with four young mothers and their small children... "You all have obsessions," he observed. To the first mother, Mary, he said, "You are obsessed with eating. You've even named your daughter Candy." He turned to the second Mom, Ann: "Your obsession is with money. Again, it manifests itself in your child's name, Penny." He turns to the third Mom, Joyce: "Your obsession is alcohol. This too manifests itself in your child's name, Brandy." At this point, the fourth mother, Kathy, gets up, takes her little boy by the hand and whispers. "Come on, Dick, we're leaving."
Monday, January 8, 2007
bus breakdowns
Traveling along the M1, the main road between Blantyre and Lilongwe, have ever taken time to note where buses break down? In the middle of nowhere all the time - no tree, no shade, no cell phone network, no grocery, no nothing!!! Not even near a lovely view of a valley or a hill.
What a start
Happy New Years to all you folks out there. It has definitely been an eventful one for me. We are in a new house and have all new staff in our household. I have also come into the new year with a load of brilliant ideas!!!
Last week I had to baby sit my 2 year and 4 month old boys! Boy oh boy, I thought house wives have it easy - give the kids a bath, feed them, send them out to play while the babies sleep then they pour themselves a glass of Gin & Tonic before relaxing in front of the TV watching Oprah and Jerry Springer. I got it all wrong! I had them all over me all day. The 2 year old toddler is hyper active and relatively loud. The younger chap is a very light sleeper. Very bad combination. At midday, i remembered a prayer that my mother had hang on her kitchen wall
Grant me patience Lord, BUT HURRY!!
Last week I had to baby sit my 2 year and 4 month old boys! Boy oh boy, I thought house wives have it easy - give the kids a bath, feed them, send them out to play while the babies sleep then they pour themselves a glass of Gin & Tonic before relaxing in front of the TV watching Oprah and Jerry Springer. I got it all wrong! I had them all over me all day. The 2 year old toddler is hyper active and relatively loud. The younger chap is a very light sleeper. Very bad combination. At midday, i remembered a prayer that my mother had hang on her kitchen wall
Grant me patience Lord, BUT HURRY!!
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