Thursday, April 24, 2008

On Muluzi and Chilumpha

On the day the United Democratic Front held it's convention, it's chairman Bakili Muluzi granted an interview to the BBC. When asked why he would like to return as Malawi's president he said because Bingu wa Mutharika had dumped the party after he was elected president and as such he needed to return the UDF to power! This type of reasoning to me is not only gravely flawed but also defied all logic. Mr Muluzi needs to be reminded that people do not ascend to power to simply punish others or for the sake of being a ruling party. They are placed in positions of authority to serve the people and going by Muluzi's past record, that is not likely to feature high on his agenda. I am not one who listens to speeches made by politicians from either side of the political divide but when I have heard a minute or two of Muluzi's speeches they have carried very little substance and his messages are frequently unintelligent. We have seen what politics based on greed and retribution are doing to Zimbabwe. Malawians need not make that mistake here.

As for Cassim Chilumpha I would think the best thing to do would be to make a graceful exit from politics now. If yesterdays results are anything to go by, Chilumpha has no support base within the UDF - he polled 38 votes for the post of chairman out of around 2,000. Commentators predicted this outcome because of his behaviour of shunning party activities and not being in touch with the grassroots. President Mutharika also 'accepted his constructive resignation' for the same kind of attitude. I also recall that in one of the last cabinets of Bakili Muluzi, Chilumpha didn't attend the swearing in ceremony when he was named minister and never took up his post and we never really knew why. He 'constructively showed Muluzi his middle finger'. He treated Muluzi the way you and I treat those vendors who stuff cheap arse watches and pirated Nigerian DVD's in our car windows in the parking lot . And to top all this, he has a treason case looming over him. Kaka, exit this game. Things don't seem to be on your side! The message is clear you are more of a political liability than anything else.

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

Zimbabwe: Whose problem is it?

Zimbabwe has got a problem, a very big one for that matter. But whose problem is it really? Thabo Mbeki has told the rest of the world to butt out and let Africans resolve the problems in an African way. So it's not a world problem but an African one? But wait, at the SADC meeting in Lusaka the head of states said it was a Zimbabwean problem that would be resolved by Zimbabweans. So it's a Zimbabwean problem now? But Morgan Tsvangirai has been lobbying regional leaders to help resolve the problem. So it would seem it's not a Zimbabwean problem after all! It's a problem that seem to lack ownership.

However this big problem belongs to needs to claim responsibility for it and sort it out, pronto! We have brown nosed Mugabe enough and the problem even more! It's time to grab this bull by it's horns once and for all. Enough is enough. Timve zina abale!

Monday, April 14, 2008

Just tell your story!

I recently attended a social gathering and met up with a friend of mine, lets call him Peter. After a few minutes Peter’s friend came along and joined us. He started talking to Peter about an issue that I was unfamiliar with, some work related issue. Not wanting to interfere in their otherwise private matter I mentally turned off and looked the other way. To my surprise Peter’s friend elbowed me and asked “isn’t that so?”. Before I could ask isn’t what so, he continued with his story and once again elbowed me “sichoncho mdala?”. Dude, I have no idea what you are talking about and even if I did, why do you need me to ‘certify’ every sentence of your story!

You always tend to come across such people once in while who keep interrupting their story with ‘ukundimvetsetsa’ or ‘wamvetsa bwinobwino pamenepo’ or something of that nature. Then occasionally you get someone who is telling an outrageously silly and nonsensical story and everybody refuses to believe him. He then pulls out his cell phone and volunteers to call someone else to ‘certify’ his story. Hey dude, even if you called ten people, I still won’t believe your story in a hundred years. Give us a break and just tell your story. I’ll be the judge of whether it’s a real story or just one of those tales told at a gathering of herd boys besides the night time bon fire!

Thursday, April 10, 2008

Hasn't Bakili been charged yet?

Last week former president Bakili Muluzi walked into Metro shop in Blantyre are left a blank cheque for 'shoppers' to pick anything they wanted and he would foot the bill. Normally where there is free stuff there is also pandemonium and many fixtures in the shop got damaged. Apparently some people had already gotten word that Muluzi would allow people to shop for free. A day later a K21 million bill stunned Muluzi and he demanded a stock take be carried out to determine the real cost.

All this caused losses for Metro and inconvenience for genuine shoppers. If Muluzi's intention was indeed genuine and sincere, he would have bought essentials and donated it to the needy and orphaned and buy things for ably bodied young democrats who most likely cleaned the alcohol shelves before they even thought of picking daily essentials. Instead he 'helps' the needy by taking single items of commodities like soap and cooking oil to campaign meetings, ridicules the government over high prices and donates those four or five items to people at the meeting. How cheeky!

My main concern is that this man has not been charged yet. We hear of cases where men were fighting over a woman and they have been arrested for conduct likely to cause a breach of peace. But here is a man whose actions threatened the lives of employees and genuine shoppers (Charge: Conduct likely to cause breach of peace), whose actions caused damage to property (Charge: Causing malicious damage to property), whose actions lead to financial losses as a result of refusing to pay a bill (Charge: Obtaining goods under false pretense). Hey, am sure our creative prosecutors can come up with many other flowery charges. He should also be sued for loss of business while Metro carried out an unscheduled stock take. Am sure any sensible shop owner is now contemplating obtaining a restraining order on this person. I would not want him anywhere near my shop!

Monday, April 7, 2008

Financial Management courses for tobacco farmers

It is the tobacco selling season in Malawi and farmers are reaping the benefits of their hard work. Take this case for example.

Four farmers in a district of the central region walked into a police station and asked for a police officer to escort them to the bank so they could withdraw their earnings. The policeman on duty was reluctant to release one of his men but eventually did so. The farmers walked in the bank and asked if their proceeds had been cleared and they had been, all K1,300,000 of it. The farmers filled out a withdrawal slip and handed it over the the teller. They withdrew all their money, took it and sat on the floor in a corner of the banking hall with the policeman standing sentry close by. The farmers shared the loot equally by placing the cash in the middle like a pack of cards with each one of them took turns picking a single K500 note at a time. This happened until they all had equally shared all of the money. Now note what each did with their loot.

- One of the farmers then took his share back to the teller to deposit into his account. Fair and good but that could have been doing without necessarily withdrawing it. making the poor teller count all that money.
- The second farmer took his share and packed it into a bag to go and show his wife after which he would come and deposit it back with the bank! Talk about seeing is believing.
- The third farmer took his share and started shopping at the trading centre. He bought bicycles, clothes, foodstuffs, you name it until he had no where to store his goods safely. Shop till you drop, perhaps?
- I don't want to even guess what the fourth farmer did with his share.

For the good security services rendered to the group, the policeman walked away with some K22,000. I can only imagine how many other people got handsome tips for watching over our third farmers goods or how many people drank free coffee in the surrounding tea rooms.

All this shows that most tobacco farmers are not good at managing their finances and urgently need some form of training. Maybe it's time Tobacco Association of Malawi, the banks and tobacco growers associations looked into the issue. Otherwise this hard earned cash will continue to be carelessly managed and needlessly wasted.

A decade is enough for any leader says Zuma

ANC president Jacob Zuma has hit the nail on the head. He has said and I quote

"You've got to have leaders who don't stay too much," Zuma said. "Ten years is enough. Beyond 10 years, politicians begin to personalise everything and there begin to have problems."
Mail & Guardian

Lets hope our greedy politicians, local and in the region alike, get the message loud and clear!

Thursday, April 3, 2008

Breaking the tobacco cartel

A few days ago when President Mutharika returned from China, he took a swipe at opposition leaders for spreading lies that he is sick instead of talking about the good tobacco prices being offered at the auction floors. John Tembo hit back saying he does not need to stand at street corners signing praises to Bingu. He said he is happy with the prices but was surprised with the drop of prices two days into the auction.

Many people were more surprised with the extraordinarily high prices at the start of trading rather than with the drop of the prices. Tobacco fetched as high as $11 per kilogramme, a far cry from the highs of $2 last year for the same quality leaf. But fingers have again pointed to the tobacco cartel that Bingu has tried so hard to break up.

There is a worldwide shortage of tobacco despite strides made by the anti-smoking lobby. As such local tobacco buyers have large orders that they can't meet. In the past there was enough tobacco to go around the two or three buyers who were there at the time. This time around not only are their more players, there is not enough of the green gold as recently farmers have shunned growing the crop because of poor prices in the past. Rumour has it the high prices were an attempt by the cartel to frustrate the new comers, whom don't have the same financial muscle of the others, take them out and share the little leaf that's available.

It would seem that breaking this cartel will be much harder than originally thought!

Wednesday, April 2, 2008

Zokamba pa maliro

Sabata yatha ndinali pa maliro ena ake kwa Kauma, mpepete mwa New State House ku Lilongwe nde ndinatolapo zinthu zingapo zokamba anthu. Zina zoseketsa, zina zomvetsa chisoni

Maphwando ku Kanengo
Panali mdala wina wake amene wadya pension yake mu Spetember 2007. Ndinawayandikira nde amafotokozera anthu ena zama party amene ankachitika ku company kumene ankagwirako. Akuti ku company-ko akagulitsa makina yoposera K1million kunkalizidwa belo, ndekuti anthu onse adziwe kuti kuli kudya ndi kumwa. Mabwana amakagula mowa wokwana 60 litres ndi zakudya zosiyanasiyana ku Hungry Lion takeaway. Ndekuti kumakhala kudyerera usiku wonse mpakana pamene ankatoperapo. Zikatero mmawa anthu amabweretseratu mabotolo akale a Sobo a 2 litres kuti madzulo atungiremo mowa wotsalawo. Komatu masana onse anthu akugwira ntchito akuti amapita kumakatunganso pang’ono namwa mpakana tsiku kutha. Chimene chinandidabwitsa nkuti company imeneyi imagulitsa ma katapila (earth moving equipment) ndiyeno ngati phwando limachitika pakagulitsidwa katundu wa K1million ndekuti maphwando nde amachitika.

Akuba kusowetsa mtendere
Kwa Kauma ko akuba akusowetsa anthu mtendere osati masewera. Nde ena anzeru zawo zolosera akuti ku Mozambique kunayambanso choncho kuti nkhondo yapachiweniweni iyambike. Akuba ankaba mmanyumba mpakana katundu wa anthu anatha. Kenako anayamba kumaba mmagrocery. Katunda amaneyo atamaliza kuba anayamba kumaphana nkutibulana basi kenako nkhondo yapachiweniweni inayambika. Nde poti ndi ma neighbours a state house basi akuwona kuti nkhondo yayambika ndithu.

Mayi alira mwana wake
Tilikudikira ku mortuary ku central, mu chipatala munatuluka anamwino ndi trolley pali mtembo wa mwana, mbuyomo muli amayi olira kuperekeza malirowo. Malirowo atayikidwa mmortuary, azimayi aja anabwera kudzakhala pa kapinga pafupi nafe namafotokoza zimene zinawachitikira. Zimawoneka kuti anthu anabwera ndi mwana wodwalika ndithu koma azachipatala analephera kuwathandiza mpakana mwanayo kuwasiya. Akuti akaphempha kuti mwanayo awonedwe, amakalipiridwa kuti “Ndili ndi manja angati kodi ine? Ndiyankheni, ndilindi manja angati”. Azimayi aja kulephera kunena kuti alipo awiri inde koma tawonani mwanayu chibwerereni sanathandizidwe, koma amapitiriza kufunsa kuti manja alinawo angati. Masiku nkutha mpakana mwana kumwalira.

Ndikhulupirira kuti Chichewachi chinali chochakuka bwino! Pepani ngati muli mwina molakwika pokuti Chinyanja Spell Checker is still under development!!